As with most processes in life, having a goal before you begin can be valuable. Even if you have to adjust the goal or your expectations of the time required to achieve the goal midway through the process, setting an initial goal is always a good idea. If you and your spouse are contemplating marriage counseling, either to work through a challenge or just improve your relationship, it can be worthwhile to talk about the goals that you want to accomplish. You may even wish to bring up this topic during your initial appointment with your counselor so that you're all on the same page. Here are some goals that you may wish to set:
Communicate More Neutrally
Couples can get into trouble when one or both of them is unable to communicate in a neutral manner. It's easy to react in anger or frustration at your partner, especially if you take what he or she says as an attack or an insult. Then, you'll end up fighting instead of actually communicating about whatever the initial issue was. You can count on your marriage counselor helping you to achieve your goal of communicating more neutrally. This can entail listening, rather than thinking about how you'll respond during an argument, empathizing with the other person's feelings, and not reacting because you're upset.
Spend More Time Together
Lots of relationships can hit bumpy patches because the couple isn't spending enough time together. Busy work schedules, for example, can often get in the way of quality time with your loved one. Wanting to spend more time together is a simple goal that you may wish to set at the start of your marriage counseling. Your therapist will get you both to explain the challenges to spending time together, and then work with you to develop strategies that can allow for more quality time during the week.
Have A Better Sex Life
Many couples go to marriage counseling to improve their sex life, which might be something that is a priority for both parties, but that is difficult to do without the help of a third person. To build a better sex life, your counselor will have you each explore your sexual identities — this may be a topic that you and your spouse have yet to share with each other in detail, and it's critical to building the sex life that you both want. You'll learn to share what you want, gain an understanding of what your partner wants, and work to combine the two.
Contact a counseling service like Tim Robbins Counseling for more information and assistance.Share